things I've found funny in the last few days.

(Apologies to boys reading this. You may wanna skip this number)
1. So, basically, my mother has reached the conclusion that I've finally reached a weight where I look "really good", "hot" and "you're gonna get picked up in that outfit" and, even more embarrassing "Just wait, can I take a photo of you before you go out?" To which I respond by changing the subject to WHERE THE FUCK ARE MY CAR KEYS and then rush out the door. Whenever we get into this conversation I complain of my fat round face & small, barely-existent boobs. To which I receive the response 'you look...in proportion.' I laugh. The only reason I look in proportion is because I wear padded bras...

2. Status updates/various statements one can 'become a fan' of on facebook.

"Dear Facebook Chat. You Never Work. Fuck You. Love ___" < for some reason facebook chat is really getting to me atm as I use it more and more frequently and hence become more and more frustrated.

Next, a new group I joined, found when doing the usual facebook stalking & reading the groups/fan pages connected to people you've never met...
"Shut Up. I Wear Heels Bigger Than Your Dick". This is also gold.

3. A little conversations between a few friends of mine that I perused. God, I have intelligent friends & intelligent people ARE the funniest. Anyway. The topic was the sizing of women's jeans, specifically, Bardot jeans. Usually I am not really allowed to complain about sizing because I am slim but Bardot, Wrangler, and plenty other brands are the exception. According to the opinion of a few prior mentioned friends, Bardot jeans have either been designed by men, or skinny bitched who enjoy making normal people feel suicidal for their own amusement. In addition, the jeans have failed in designing clothes for women, instead directing their market to midget children. Or, if they (Bardot) argue that their clothes are indeed designed for 'young women', these are young women without arses, thighs, or a lower half in general. AND one friend got told that size 9 was a 'larger size.' Hello, this is AUSTRALIA. i have 2 x pairs of size 9 jeans and I'm medically underweight. WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS WOMAN ON ABOUT.

I also have 2 x pairs of size 7 jeans. I have a disturbing amount of jeans, boots, jackets (+1 today, shit), boots, and plain tops. One could always use another plain top because 'I'll get lots of wear out of it' which is all very well and good until you get home & realise 3 plain black tops (1 long-sleeved, 1 x 3/4 sleeve, 1 x scoop neck, 1 t-shirt...) is borderline ridiculous.

Anyway. I really need to go to sleep. I should. I ACTUALLY THINK I'M SICK OF FACEBOOK! Tomorrow I am buying coffee, what the hell. Assignment night, hardcore.